My top tip for getting a picky eater to eat what you want them to! 

As we were hanging out with our neighbors on Sunday night, the 3 year old, upon seeing my son TJ eating an apple, picked up an apple and started eating one himself.  Shocked, my neighbor Julie said, “We are witnessing a miracle here! He never eats apples!”  Julie’s 3 year old loves my 8 year old son TJ, and loves to copy things he does.  The strategy that has worked for me in getting kids to try new food, is none other than:

Peer Pressure!

You can call it modeling or mimicking, but the fact is, peer pressure has proven to be effective over and over in the circumstances I’ve witnessed with a picky eater. The pickiest eaters won’t even hesitate to eat the same foods as their friends, whether they like the food or not.

Peer pressure is defined as “social pressure by members of one’s peer group to take a certain action, adopt certain values, or otherwise conform in order to be accepted.” (source)

Seeing their friends, or mentors eating vegetables that your kids would normally not eat, is great motivation for them to try it.  The best results I’ve seen here is when it is by their actual peers… by other children.  It’s great for your kids to see you eating fruits and vegetables, but the powerful impact of their peers eating them is amazing.

Our second incident was over Kiwi.  TJ didn’t like Kiwi for a long time. Then one day, we had one of his friends over for lunch.  The friend, Douglas, had brought a kiwi from home.  I mentioned how delicious it looked, and replied with

“It’s my favorite! It’s sour! Do you like sour things TJ?”  Suddenly for the first time, TJ wanted to try kiwi!

So, yesterday we tried it with 2 year old Michael, who LOVES Nathan!  Of course he wanted to try it when he saw Nate eating it!

(Actual picture of Michael asking for kiwi that his favorite cousin Nate is eating)

How to encourage peers to influence your picky eater Leverage school lunch

Not only can peers encourage each other to eat a new food, studies have actually shown in a school lunch room, they brag about the different foods they are willing to eat “….it seems that once at school there’s a desire to fit in with everyone else and even some positive peer pressure to boast about the variety of what foods you can eat.  (source)  Research has found that 4 out of 5 kids will try a new food at school, that they have never tried at home.   According to the BBC:

“Getting children to eat healthily is every parent’s dream, but meal times at home can often be a battle ground and emotionally charged.  From Mumsnetters’ experience it seems that once at school there’s a desire to fit in with everyone else and even some positive peer pressure to boast about the variety of what foods you can eat.”

Orchestrate the playdate

I have done this! Knowing a neighbor loved spinach salad, I invited him for a play date and dinner!  I of course served, Spinach salad! My son Nate, in not having an interest in this salad in the past, saw his friend eating seconds of his salad, and took some himself. I didn’t even say a word, and he just ate it!


The teenage picky eater

Although as kids grow up, their palate naturally expands, and they are wiling to try and taste new foods, but do they choose these foods when they are with their other teenage, influential friends?  They can! You behave similarly to the way your closest groups of friends behave (as adults as well as teens). So when my friends daughter had a friend that loved bell peppers and brought them to school in her lunch every day, so her daughter was intrigued enough and liked her friend so much that peppers became one of her favorite foods too!  While you can’t choose your teenagers friends the way you can choose their friends in preschool, it might be worth your time to inquire about what they bring in their lunch to help your teenager notice!  Unfortunately, many teenagers eat fast food during school lunch, but one highly influential teen can change that and set the tone for their group of friends.

teenager boy learning to cook

Have you noticed the same thing?  So, with this powerful strategy in your pocket, use it to your advantage!  My recommendation is to invite your kids friends over for lunch if you know they enjoy a vegetable your kids won’t try! You’ll be surprised.


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